The Links - 12/05/2008

By: Taylor Rockwell | December 4th, 2008

A Roy Keane Retrospective

In honor of my fallen idol, who went from Lord Ferg reincarnate to outcast in about a week, I give you the video evidence of my we fell in love with Keano in the first place.

1 - Perhaps the most notorious of all Roy Keane’s on-field actions was his tackle on Alf-Inge Håland, which reminded us never to mock an Irishman with an injured tendon.

2 - We also learned early on that if you happen to be a primadonna from the St. James’ Park area, Keano might just throw things at your head.

3 - Ditto if you’re an uppity Frenchman who often deserved quite the ass whooping.

4 - It wasn’t all just violence however, lest Arsenal forget. How awesome is that first celebration?

5 - And if all that isn’t enough, then just watch this and try not to be overtaken by nostalgia… and just imagine what Keano would do to Slave were he still on the team.

Some Pretty Decent Articles Defending #7’s Selection as the Ballon D’Or

1 - Tired of the arguments about how Slave doesn’t show up in the big matches? Think that perhaps that argument may be an oversimplification of his talents? Then you, friend, agree with Tom Drisdell.

2 - If that argument still isn’t enough to convince you that Slave deserves his newly claimed title, then you can also take it up with Barney Ronay and his excellent article on how #7 is “the last of a dying breed.” He also manages to call out Joe Cole, so it’s worth a read just for that.

3 - And if that still isn’t enough, then you may as well let Slave tell you about himself himself.

Toddlers Getting Ruined

My buddy Brian sent me all of the following links in an email entitled “F*** Toddlers.” My guess, astute readers, is that you can figure out what’s coming. As a warning, you can also think of this as a list that new parents should probably keep their kids from doing:

1 - Getting owned by a dodgeball

2 - Getting owned by a basketball

3 - Getting owned by a breakdancer

Other Interesting Reads

1 - If you, like me, still find yourself a wee bit saddened by the thought of a Premier League without Roy Keane, then the question begs itself: was his departure an inevitability?

2 - For all you high school students out there who find Hamlet a tad too difficult to relate to, then might I suggest the modern, Facebook adaptation?

3 - If you are a fan of either TheOnion, The Daily Show, or The Colbert Report, then here is your sports equivalent… and he even takes time to call out Ghana for beating America in 2006.

And All The Rest

1 - Yet another link that clearly represents my less-than-mature love of YouTube. How much would you pay to see this happen in an actual match? I would probably give up half my yearly salary to see it happen to Jens Lehmann.

2 - With Paul Scholes making his return to action Wednesday night against Blackburn, I felt the need to go out and prove that I was a loyal follower of the Ginger Prince. I failed severely.

3 - If you’ve always suspected that there was something sinister about Peyton Manning, you don’t know how right you were… seriously, hide your kids.

4 - Do you find it impossible to get tired of the Christopher Walken impression? Neither does SNL.

5 - And finally, as if you needed it, the #1 NOT to hide in a trashcan.